I don't complain about my son having T1D. Yes I was upset and scared the day he was diagnosed. I didn't really know what a whole lot about diabetes and didn't know what it meant for us. We took the diagnosis and just started our new life of carb counting and insulin. I talk a lot about his diabetes but I don't complain.
Today has been one of those days that most people complain about. Nathanael has been having really good numbers since he came back from camp. In fact, we have been battling a lot of lows especially at night. This was completely new to us. So we have been trying to get him to eat some protein before bed to help keep him elevated. Well, he really likes peanut butter. He also doesn't like to measure. So he has been having night time highs because of it. It's been working out because he gets up at normal numbers or even lower than we are used to. Nathanael's night time number last time was too high for comfort. He was in the 300's. So he got insulin at 2 AM. Then at 6 he was still in the lower 200's. So he got more insulin. I figured he would need to do a site change. I just let him sleep and got the supplies out for him to do it when he got up. Of course, being 13, he doesn't like to take care of himself first. So it took him a little while to change his site and his reservoir since he was almost out of insulin. He did go lower initially after his site change and then he ate lunch. I called him during my lunch time to see what his blood sugar was and he was 540. I couldn't believe it. He has been doing so well. He ate 5 corn dogs for lunch. I was sure he underestimated the carbs. He doesn't look anything up. He just guesses. But after doing the math, he was only under by about 20 carbs. That isn't that big of a difference to go so high. He gave himself more insulin and I told him to check in 30 minutes, drink lots of water, check for keytones, and drink more water until he felt like he couldn't drink anymore. He did have slight keytones so I told him drink more. After 30 minutes, his blood sugar had gone up another 20 points. He took his site out without me telling him to change his site and low and behold, his canula was bent. He changed his site again, gave himself the insulin that he didn't get at lunch. So after another 30 minutes, he dropped 100 points. The rest of the afternoon he has been dropping. Supper tonight consisted of scrambled eggs. No carbs so he didn't have to take any more insulin. He took 4 more units at 5 PM. So hopefully by bedtime he will be back in normal range.
It's days like this that I can see why people get so frustrated with diabetes. I just don't complain about what I can't change. I try to get Nathanael to understand what is going on. He gets so upset when he's running high. I try and get him to stop and think about how long it has been since he last tested. How long he last ate. What did he eat. He just needs someone to explain to him that when he puts 5 pounds of peanut butter on 2 pieces of bread that he is going to go high and stay high through out the day. I try to explain I don't care what you eat or how much, but it needs to be measured and carbs counted correctly.
Tonight he was doing dishes and starting to get really frustrated. I made him quit and take a break. He was headed for a breakdown. He laid on the couch in complete frustration. His blood sugar was still coming down. He gets frustrated about the littlest things when he is high. So as he laid on the couch, I sat with him and reminded him of what he learned at camp with regard to yoga. He really wasn't impressed with yoga but it taught him some deep breathing. So I helped him with his breathing to calm down. After about 4 rounds, he said, I feel much better now. I then explained to him that when he starts to feel that way he needs to learn to take a break and calm himself down. It does no one any good with him frustrated. When he gets frustrated, his blood sugar just goes higher, he get angrier, then gets more frustrated and he just keeps going up. It's a terrible cycle that only he can break.
I just hope that he can learn to deal with all of this when he is completely on his own. That way he won't have to live a frustrated life with T1D. He has never complained about how terrible diabetes is. Yes it isn't a pleasant thing to have but he has adjusted well to his new life. Ever since diabetes camp, he has been doing a really good job in taking care of himself. He doesn't hide his pump on the inside of his shorts. He was even given a medical alert bracelet from his grandfather that belonged to his grandmother. He never wanted to wear a bracelet until his grandpa gave it to him. He wore it for 3 days before I told him that we would need to have type 1 engraved on the back. (Diabetic was already engraved and I wanted Type 1 put on there.) When I came back from the jewelry he asked if I was able to get it engraved.
I feel that God doesn't give us more than we can handle. I also believe that Nathanael was chosen because he can handle this. I'm also very thankful that we live in a part of the country where Nathanael doesn't have to deal with ignorance. He doesn't get the comments like "you got diabetes from eating too much sugar." I don't have friends who post not so funny diabetes jokes on my Facebook wall. We live and associate with a pretty understanding community. Should he be eating donuts? The question really is, should any of us really be eating donuts?
